Your legacy is not a fallacy

Neil Baum, MD

"You will stay in heaven as long as your good deeds are remembered on earth."

This quote emphasizes the idea that a person's legacy and memory live on through the good deeds they performed during their lifetime. If positive actions and contributions continue to be remembered and appreciated by those still living, the person's spirit remains present in a metaphorical "heaven" of lasting remembrance and honor. People tend to think of legacy purely in terms of something that happens after you die. But the truth is, legacies are formed while you're alive — and the best way to leave a legacy is to live it, day by day. A legacy isn't going to somehow magically happen after you die. This article will focus on the importance of creating a legacy before our time runs out.

I graduated from medical school in 1968, and I have tried to keep in touch with many of my classmates. We had reunions every five years, and I tried to attend to see friends and colleagues and to share stories about our past and our aspirations for our future. The 5-10-15 year reunions were frequently associated with bragging rights or "mine is bigger than yours!' Most of my classmates were on a trajectory of stardom, success, and happiness. By the time we had our 20th reunion, I was met with some surprises: some of my classmates did not attend because they had passed away! However, more than a few were divorced, and most of the male graduates were overweight. The conversations gravitated to their medical conditions, and two of my classmates were in prison. I'm sure that wasn't on their goal list or radar upon graduation from medical school! Many of the classmates did not enjoy what they were doing and were clearly unhappy; today, we call it burnout. Their trajectories did not match what I had seen just a few years earlier. Clearly, their professional and personal lives were out of balance. I am not a naysayer, as most of my classmates led exemplary lives and have served as an inspiration to others in the medical profession. So how do those classmates who have exemplary careers differ from those who are just grinding it out, are unhappy, don't have the enjoyment and satisfaction that medicine offers, and just hoping that their 401K will take them to retirement and that they won't run out of funds before they and the hourglass of time really runs out?

Without a solid plan in place, the chances of you being able to maintain the focus and momentum needed to create a legacy are slim, not because of any failing on your part, but just because life is long. There are thousands of things competing for our attention every day.

How do you want to be remembered? Is it your dedication to your patients? Is it your experience as an entrepreneur? Is it your philanthropy? Is it your love for your family? While it's natural to focus on big accomplishments, it's the little actions that leave a lasting imprint. This article will explore how to create a legacy that outlives you.

Why is a legacy important?

Knowing that you're working towards an impact after you are gone gives your life a sense of purpose. Through your legacy, you can continue to influence and shape the world even after you're gone and contribute to future generations and the betterment of your profession or community.

It drives you to make meaningful choices and strive for excellence in your professional and personal life. By building a legacy, you provide purpose and fulfillment in your present life. Your legacy inspires others to pursue their dreams and make a difference.

WOOP it up

There are all sorts of planning frameworks, but one that works super well for this kind of long-term endeavor is the WOOP framework, from Gabrielle Oettingen, PhD, Professor of Psychology at NYU. She advises thinking about how you want things to be, as contrasted to how things are now — the WOOP framework helps you take focused action.

Wish — You start out by making a wish. Think about your greatest wishes for your legacy. What do they look like?

Outcome — Then envision the outcome. What's the best possible outcome for you here? How will you know you've succeeded? (This is why it's important to get at your core motivation for leaving a legacy first — otherwise, how will you be able to figure out the conditions for success?)

Obstacles — Think about the things that might get in the way of you being able to leave the legacy you want. Brainstorm a list, just let your mind come up with any and everything that might get in the way, no matter how weird or unlikely it is. Then prioritize those obstacles based on their likelihood and the potential consequences.

Plans — Using that list of obstacles, create "if-then" plans. For each obstacle, have an alternative plan: "If Obstacle A happens, I'll do B", or "When Obstacle C happens, then I'll do D".

Start with what you want to be known for? Ask, what do I want others to say about me when I'm not in their presence? You can encourage feedback from trusted colleagues who observe you in various contexts, such as with patients, family, friends, and colleagues. You can initiate this conversation by asking, "I'm reflecting on the kind of impact I'm having. Would you share your experience of our relationship?"

Then write down what you want to be known for. This first step often brings clarity to developing your legacy.

You might consider asking close friends and family these questions:

1. What are a few words you'd use to describe me?
2. What's something I might not realize about myself?
3. Where do I make the most significant impact?

Next, after receiving feedback from others, make adjustments. The responses you receive to those questions will be helpful to translate others' opinions into action for creating the legacy while you are still here. It's about bridging any gaps between the person you want to be known as and how others experience you. The valuable feedback you receive helps you make any adjustments to improve your legacy.

Use the feedback to adjust, such as:

• Making more time with family and friends
• Carving out time for others outside of your practice
• Sharing your thoughts honestly with others
• You may want to be remembered as a physician who helps patients between visits

Whenever possible, be specific and avoid generalities such as "I want to be known as a good person." Think of action steps and details to improve, such as:

• I have high standards and set an example for everyone who interacts with me.
• I know how to have fun, and I always leave time for levity.
• I am generous, including having a good attitude about money: earning it, spending it, and giving it away.
• I am an effective mentor.
• I have a passion for (insert a hobby, avocation, or recreation) outside of medicine
• I am a loving spouse, parent, and friend.
• I can balance work, family, and fun.

And finally review and revise. To live your legacy while you are here requiring listing specifics and then regularly reviewing the changes you want to make.

Bottom Line: The desire to leave a legacy seems to be innate to humans. Research shows that it's a way of preserving the essence of yourself after you die, and it helps make sense of the end of life. No matter where you are in your career, it's time to think about your legacy and how you want to be remembered.

I want to end this article with a quote from Mark Twain, who summed it up nicely: "The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why." Creating your legacy helps you find out why.

Neil Baum, MD, a Professor of Clinical Urology at Tulane University in New Orleans, LA. Dr. Baum is the author of several books, including the best-selling book, Marketing Your Medical Practice-Ethically, Effectively, and Economically, which has sold over 225,000 copies and has been translated into Spanish.